M is for Mascaron

The middle of the alphabet is rich in architectural dungeony things. There are almost as many good M's as L's, like Madhouse, Malt House, Mall, Mantel, Martyrium, Mastaba, Mausoleum, and Maze.

Mascarons are stone carvings of grotesque faces—some human, some beasts, and most a mix of the two. The majority of mascarons in a dungeon are ordinary (if unusual looking) stone carvings, but some are magical.

This mascaron's eyes rove continually, wildly, and not in the same direction. It will jibber and try to bite anyone or anything that comes close:

This one truthfully answers one question posed by any Lawful character:

This one tries to loudly spit on anyone passing below (then look innocent):

Animal noises emanate from this one, although it never moves:

This one hurls foul insults (in a long-forgotten language) at anyone who passes. If the PC's somehow manage to communicate with it in its own tongue, it will reveal the location of treasure in exchange for the PC's telling it salacious stories. When it doesn't know any more real treasure locations, it will invent treasures to keep the PC's interest. It leers, and ogles any female party members regardless of their charisma.

The Creative Commons images above were created by wallyg, takomabibelot, Landahlauts, and Xavier de Jaureguiberry.

(This is for the A-Z Blogger Challenge.)

L is for Library

There are so many great L things that I could almost do a whole month of them: Laboratory, Labyrinth, Lamp-Post, Lantern of the Dead, Laundry, Lavatoire, Letterbox, Lich Gate, Lighthouse, Loculus, Lookout, and Lunatic Asylum.

I've tried to pick lesser-known architectural features in previous entries, but today it's Library. I'll take this opportunity to compose a table I've been meaning to write for a long time: random generation of library books for inquisitive PC's.

Optional supertitle:

1. History of
2. Natural History of
3. Encounters with
4. Mother's
5. Some Observations on
6. Encyclopedia of
7. Dictionary of
8. Illustrated
9. The Truth About
10. First-Hand Accounts of
11. The King's
12. The New
13. Jokes for
14. Almanac of
15. Back to Basics
16. A Lady's
17. A Gentleman's
18. Diary of
19. The Big Book of
20. The Art of

Part the earlier:

1. Northern
2. Southern
3. Eastern
4. Western
5. Misleading
6. Revised
7. Condensed
8. Elritch
9. Night
10. Collegiate
11. Rapid
12. Surefire
13. Zero Tolerance
14. Preventing
15. Foundational
16. Childhood
17. Equestrian
18. Naval
19. Incomplete
20. Culinary

Part the latter:

1. Wars
2. Birds
3. Stars
4. Apprentices
5. Navigation
6. Bottling
7. Brewing
8. Grammar
9. Sewing
10. Worthies
11. Rules
12. Anecdotes
13. Test Preparation
14. Success
15. Etiquette
16. Mating
17. Travels
18. Cities
19. Flowers
20. Faith

Optional subtitle:

1. Explained
2. (A Life)
3. For Beginners
4. Yearbook
5. In Conversation
6. In Style
7. For Little Ones
8. In Brief
9. And Other Adventures
10. A Structural Analysis
11. And Other Secrets
12. Avoid The Pitfalls
13. Faster Than You Ever Thought Possible
14. Bilingual Edition
15. On Parade!
16. In 24 Hours
17. Making It Pay
18. A Journey of the Spirit
19. A Space Odyssey
20. Like A Pro

Find more lists in my forthcoming book Jokes for Northern Wars.

(This is for the A-Z Blogger Challenge.)

K is for Kura

A kura is a Japanese storehouse for valuable things, built to be fireproof. Mundane things like rakes and bicycles would be stored elsewhere. Japanese homes have limited storage, so things that aren't used everyday—prized items like wedding china or family photo albums—go in the kura.

That's a position that makes a kura somewhat interesting when transposed to a fantasy setting. Perhaps the orcs in your dungeon live on a subsistence level, owning barely enough to survive. They wouldn't have to worry about precious keepsakes. But maybe they're a few steps above subsistence.

What can the PC's find in the monsters' kura?

1. Stone box adorned with narrative carvings
2. Urn filled with ash
3. Garishly colored robes
4. Ancestral weapon (broken, unmendable)
5. Religious icon
6. Locks of hair tied in silk ribbons
7. Sacred wine
8. Skulls of enemies
9. Porcelain vases
10. Festival masks
11. Delicate, impractical furniture
12. Small box containing a fine brush, a small glass bottle of dried-up ink, and a block of sealing wax

The photo in this post was dedicated to the Creative Commons by Kenchikuben.

(This is for the A-Z Blogger Challenge.)

J is for Jacquemart

A jacquemart (also spelled without the "c") is a brass figure that moves by clockwork. Typically these figures appear in pairs—one on either side of a bell, which they strike with hammers.

If one was of a mind to put jacquemarts in one's dungeon, the obvious thing would be to make them some sort of golems or ambulatory automatons to attack the PC's. That's a bit too obvious. More interesting would be for the players to see without being able to immediately reach one or more jacquemarts. Soon after first seeing them, the players discover or deduce their terrible mechanical function.

The exact nature of that function is up to you. Perhaps some twirly-mustached villain has bound the princess helplessly to the bell, soon to be pulverized by a dumb jacquemart hammer unless the PC's reach the works in time. Or perhaps the clockwork has been in motion for centuries, slowly chipping away at the lock imprisoning a Great Eldritch Horror.

Though the players can see the inexorable, pitiless progress of the clockwork from some distance, it will take them time to fight their way up the mountain or across the gorge. Melodramatic? Yes, but it might be fun.

The above photo was dedicated to the Creative Commons by Jean-Louis Zimmermann.

(This is for the A-Z Blogger Challenge.)

I is for Infirmary

In the most general sense, an infirmary is a place for the sick, but a dungeon infirmary bears little resemblance to a modern hospital.

Creatures without a society, or whose existence in the dungeon is mostly solitary, may simply crawl into a crevice or little-used corridor to sicken and die.* To social monsters (or, if not social per se, then those who tend to horde together in some numbers) sickness presents a different challenge. Those intelligent enough to understand the dangers of infectious disease kill or isolate the victims. Such infirmaries are more oubliette than hospital ward.

Adventuring parties stumbling across dungeon areas that appear significantly less traveled than neighboring areas—particularly sub-levels distinguished by bricked-up portals and unburied bodies—should exercise caution.

1. Fungal infection†
2. The Rots†
3. Bubbling boils†
4. It itches!†
5. More of them grow than the normal/original number†
6. Insect bites transmit it, then bleeding fissures—ouch†

* The carcass remains infectious for 1d6 weeks after death.

† Symptoms manifest in 1d6 hours; death occurs in 1d6 days.

(This is for the A-Z Blogger Challenge.)

H is for Hearse

I admit that my selection for H is driven more by etymological interest than utility in a dungeon, but a hearse is a fine thing still.

Hearse originally meant just an iron grating, such as any gate or portcullis. The word comes from the Old French herce (a rake or harrow) because of the spiky ironwork. Eventually, the meaning narrowed to refer to a fence around a tomb or a temporary iron triumphal arc erected over a coffin, usually draped in banners and affixed with candles.

Our contemporary sense of the word dates to the seventeenth century.

(Incidentally the Old French herce might be traced back to the Latin hirpus for wolf, because of the resemblance to sharp teeth. I think it's a nice poetical image—the coffin resting inside a wolf's maw.)

(This is for the A-Z Blogger Challenge.)

G is for Ghat

A ghat is a kind of quay or landing found along rivers in the East, particularly India. Unlike a Western pier, a ghat is a long set of steps that extend into the water, usually with a fortification-like buildings at their head. They're used for arrivals and departures for water travel and cargo, and as community gathering spots.

Imagine a long ghat flanking the underground river in your dungeon.

McKay Savage licensed the above photo under the Creative Commons.

(This is for the A-Z Blogger Challenge.)